Drugs, Yoga or Warrior Meditation? | Paul and Jacob from Save A Warrior | Rise Grind Repeat 033

In the 33rd installment of Rise Grind Repeat, we connect with Jacob and Paul, a couple of veterans with really big plans for helping the local veteran community with meditation and yoga programs! The program is called Save a Warrior and it is awesome.

It was fun chopping it up with a couple of American heroes continuing their journey by helping others like themselves.

So let’s jump right in and see what’s go on in and see what these vets have gone through!

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save a warrior

00:37 Yeah, I appreciate you guys coming out. So I mean the reason why I’m excited is interesting. Uh, You bought a motorcycle from us. I don’t know what to do with my hands. That a good reference actually the first time, but that was good. At first I was like what is he doing? And then since, and so yeah, you bought a motorcycle and uh, just started talking and a lot of what I mean you’re saying the, the mental side of things, the, just everything you were saying was awesome. And so just wanting to connect and hear more of what you guys are doing. Um, just figure some things out. It sounds like you guys are just starting. Um, and so we’d just love to hear more about it. Are you guys both work on this together or?

01:20 Yeah, it all came about through a program save a warrior, which is technically a war detox, what they call it, but I found out it’s pretty much suicide prevention, um, program that, uh, we went through at different times, but, um, we connected actually through Facebook, um, group healing voices, live tribe and uh, found out he was actually alumni save a warrior and, uh, we just connected and wanting to give back. Like that’s one thing that save a war, does it gets the thing under the thing, which for me discovered I was alcoholic in it and I was before save a warrior, I was doing all the things that the VA wanted us to do, you know, went to, um, operation man who was a part of the wounded warrior project doing all these things, but it just kept like cycling back around and it was just never, um, still had those suicidal thoughts about that ideology.

02:17 And I’m going to save a warrior. Like they practice meditation. Um, it’s the backbone of it. Warrior Meditation, which we want to, you know, give to the fellow veterans, cause that’s a practice that you put in. So it’s not about the tools, it’s about the practice of what goes on. And we’re, you know, I mean, not to be prideful or whatever, but where are the examples of that? Because we came from, you know, this just inner torment for me was like, even on the outside, like he met me when I was in California before I moved here. I had the wife, the house, new brand new daughter. And still there were times when I’d sit at home and be like, what the hell am I doing here? Like this is not enough. And that’s where, um, this self discovery, this understanding and connection with a higher power building something bigger than yourself.

03:05 You know, for me, it’s, God, whatever you wanna call it. I mean, it doesn’t matter what they’re called, but it’s like that would go away. And I found that, I define that, you know, in myself and through recovery, I have 15 months of sobriety. Um, and it’s, it’s huge because it brings, it brought me places where I never thought possible, you know what I mean? And then like this, being able to accept things as they are and doing all that, that was just a big part of my life. And now it’s like I want to do something for others, right? Like if I to get out of my own stuff, I have to be there for someone else and I have to give away what I want the most. And there’s process. We’ve, you know, see there’s a missing for the veterans here. They’re all trying to do what the VA ask them and all that.

03:55 And me, I was just dropped from several programs that I was doing everything I need to do, but I’m back and forth from California here right now. Um, so it’s like that struggle is real and it’s, if I didn’t have the practice that I had, I could see where, you know, the people that go on the VA and they’re all pissed off and they, and then, you know, we look crazy. It’s like, yeah, did all look crazy. Like, you can try to put a straight jacket on me. All the crazy. That’s why I want to tell him, you know, all of the truth about it, because I heard they’ll lock you up and do all this. And I’m like, he locked me up, dude. I’m going to be there forever because I’m going to be fighting it the whole time. Yeah. So that’s the, that’s the warrior in me.

04:32 But, uh, through warrior meditation and being able to go through these three phases, it’s like I can come back to center. I can see that, that’s like a thought or whatever and then be able to let it go. But without that practice, it’s like we’re crazy or out there, you know what I mean? But, so we want to give that back to as many people as we can on our reach as many people and give them this simple practice. I mean, some of it’s, you know, making your bed and meditating and inside. If you’re not doing that, then, you know. Yeah. And, uh, we do, uh, you know, I’ve got a lot of healing through yoga as well, like the practice of moving our body and just being okay with being okay. You know what I mean? Not Having to like live up to anybody’s expectations or whatever, but just learning to be ordinary, which is not easy for someone who, you know, like us who went through war and did all this.

05:25 And it’s like, for me it was a lot of like when people would say something like, dude, you don’t know me. Like you don’t even want to go there with me. And before when I was drinking and all that, that would all come out. Like I wouldn’t cry unless I was drinking. I wouldn’t release any emotions or anything unless I was drinking. And now I get to feel those feelings sober and be around a group of loving man. That’s like the initiation from death and killing and dying to initiation of empathy and love. And, uh, that’s what the program gave me.

05:53 Nice. So, I mean, what was your experience going through and kind of the same thing or what did you go through the Va route? Didn’t really see success and,

06:01 oh, absolutely. Yeah. I, uh, it took a while to get to the Va. It took Kevin a friend a, this is back when I still lived in Indiana before a few of my buddies, we all got out, uh, out of the army and one of the move somewhere together. So once they got out, we all moved here, but I was in Indiana and I had this friend who worked at the Va and she worked with a Vietnam veterans. And she just kept telling me, cause me and my buddy would joke like we were depressed, me and another friend that were out of the army and we really were, but we just also found it funny how depressed we were. So we joke around about it and just like really morbid jokes all the time, which is kind of normal, uh, with army folk and military folk. But, uh, she’s just like, you could tell that it saddened her to hear it. It just kept encouraging me and my buddy also to go to the VA and get help and it just kept pushing for that until I finally did, because she just kept saying, she’s like, yeah, I got Vietnam vets in all the time and they have trouble proving that anything serve as connected and they’re not able to get help. And they’re in a place where they’ve been struggling for so long that they usually can’t even afford to get any help. So it’s like a huge uphill battle at that point. So she’s just like, go in now. And finally I did and it was God awful. First thing I said to the doctor is like, I don’t want any pills. I don’t want to be on antidepressants or any of that crap. I want to like do something more natural. I left there with two new prescriptions. Next time I went in, these are making me feel like a Zombie. I got a new one and the next one it’s like, I’m too tired. Okay, well here’s some Ridlan having trouble sleeping. Take the sleeping pill too. And it just kept being like, we’ve got a fucking bottled up solution for your problem and throw them out it. Yeah, pretty much. Yeah. And sometimes it’d be transitioning from one to the next like with the antidepressants or anti anxiety, but usually it’s just like, let’s stack on this other thing to just, you still have this symptom over here. Let’s, let’s see if we can just fix that symptom and it, yeah, none of it. I liked, they did say I could be in therapy, but they only had an ability to put me in group therapy and I was like, I don’t want to talk to a bunch of motherfuckers who are just whining about their shit and it’s like I was infantry. I was like, I don’t want to, I want to hear somebody talking about how a mortar hit there base somewhere far away. Like I didn’t care. So it didn’t go that route. Finally got them to let me talk to a therapist and she was like, maybe 20, 23, 24 looked like she’s fresh out of school. And she looked like she would validate herself if she could get me to cry while we were in there. So I was like, no, that’s not happening anyways. But uh, yeah, it just didn’t, didn’t care for her and just the tonality and the like questions she was even crying at didn’t seem to be the actual issue for me. And she’s asking about like Yahoo at the time I got blown up or the friends that died. And like, none of that was like what I see is the actual problem. They’re looking for this like what catalyzed the travel. That one experience, that one event that was like God awful. But for a lot of people that I know and myself included, it’s not that, it’s the like compound effect of everything. And then you add in all the crap from childhood because look at who joins the military. It’s a lot of people with like less than great childhood experiences, uh, and just stack on a year of taking antibiotics every day. I’m like, my thought is fucking up your gut biome, which causes anxiety and stress. Like it causes inflammation throughout the body and we’re eating crap food in a high stress environment everyday. Like wondering if you’ll get hoping actually hoping it will get shot that day, uh, shot at, because that’s, it’s what I signed up for it. That was the fun stuff. Uh, but the VA thinks like getting shot at was my trauma, which, you know, it’s going to buddy goes in with smiling ear to ear. I finally, yeah. Uh, but yeah, it’s, it’s odd and then you come back and everything’s just so fast paced. You know, that like, you’re like, okay, yeah, you got gotta like friends die, but you don’t even have time to grieve it. And like, it’s just like, okay, well we got three patrols tomorrow, so let’s keep that going. And then you come back and you start to, like, everybody starts to drink and celebrate, but then you quickly start to see and not even recognize without the hindsight now that like, that’s when people would start crying and stuff. Everybody’s getting drunk like crazy and everybody starting to cry. Like everybody’s like when they’re drunk at times, just like this dude this night, this dude this night just talking about how things aren’t right, uh, missing, uh, friends that we lost.

10:31 What would you say that these are more truths? Like basically it’s being hidden in the alcohol. Just base as you start drinking just comes out. Yeah.

10:38 Yeah, absolutely. And then, uh, cause like I, I kept a secret, like I couldn’t sleep at night. I went and complained to us not being able to sleep at night, but I didn’t say why. Like I kept going into like a, the aid station and I’m like, Yo, I need some for sleep. I just, I cannot fall asleep. And everybody was drinking themselves to sleep. So the truth was they can’t sleep. They’re not okay mentally. So they start drinking like crazy to just suppress that problem and make it be okay for awhile and then can’t sleep. So they started giving us what Nyquil telling us to take nyquil. And as soon as I stopped to work and start taking Tylenol pm and then Benadryl just cycled through that stuff.

11:13 Yeah. So that, that was the solution for that. But it’s also because we were trained not to complain about stuff. You injure yourself. You’re now the asshole who’s injured and doesn’t have to do PT and you’re not functioning with the unit. So you’re like a cast out until like you start actually saying you’re fine. So you’re pushing through broken ankles, you’re pushing through whatever, just so that you’re not that dude. So it’s the same just mentality with mental health, especially with that, because you’re like, oh, I could lose my job. They’re gonna send me away. And we did. We were not nice to people who claim to have PTSD. Really. They were cast out. They were mentally weak. We would make fun of them like that. That’s how it was in the military. We, we, it was horrible. Like, even in basic training, like if people who are suicidal, we made fun of them for being suicidal. Yeah. Like people actually like taking razor blades to their arms and slashing themselves. We’d save him and they make fun of him. Yeah. Uh, and it’s because you don’t want that in your environment because that’s not safe during deployment. So it kind of makes sense. Yeah. But it’s also got awful. Yeah. I do think that there’s a different approach that can be

12:17 taken. That kind of, I mean I see the mental toughness. Like I mean you got to, it’s going to be 10 x once you get out there, like, you know, across the country. And so it’s like, I, I hear that you gotta be tough, but is there maybe a different approach that still instills that mental toughness? But without that aspect to where it’s almost like, I mean I, I grew up playing baseball and it’s the same mentality. It’s like even if you’re hurt, you’re not going to tell your, your hurt. Cause then it’s just like after the game, after practicing back in the locker room, it’s like, Oh, who are like, you know what I mean? You’re saying get made fun of. And so it’s like the, the mentality side, it’s, and it’s, is there a way to create that mental toughness without keeping people’s emotions bottled in to then later expo? You know what I mean?

12:57 I believe so. I’d say it’s, I don’t think they’re going to change it because it’s the, what happens in boot camp is they break you from your primary group. So there’s a whole breaking down and rebuilding of that. But through, um, I mean, mental toughness comes through meditation. It comes through, you know, being, you know, courage, right? Courage is not the absence of fear. It’s in acknowledging and fear and working through it. So they teach just blind obedience. And I don’t believe that’s, um, that’s good for the, for the person, the individual, you can create a space, a safe space where they can, where they can talk about their fears and what’s going on and then work through them. Because I mean, that is a fear. It’s like, but it’s never addressed really. It’s like we’re out there. I remember nine 11 happened when I was in a high tech core, which is, I was a technical rating as a fire control in charge of the weapon systems on the ship.

14:03 And when that happened, all the people were like, streamlined. I didn’t, that didn’t sign up for this. I just want, I just want to call it and money and I’m looking around, I’m like, holy crap, I’m going to war with these guys that are nothing. I mean, we witnessed something happening, right. But then they’re like freaking out. And I was, that was me. I was like, okay, well, and I agree. You know, I grew up in a small farming community, so we were tough country boys. Like it’s like whatever, you know, but, um, that, I don’t think that was even addressed. Like that was a huge thing that happened that they just kinda whatever all these people are freaking out and they just telling, you know, whatever. But, um, there’s just part, I was talking with someone too and it’s like to get the mission accomplished, they don’t have time to go and address.

14:49 Every experience happens. So that’s what is there. But there can be something like save a warrior for the people getting out. They do something, transition assistance program, whatever. They teach you all this stuff or whatever, but it’s like they don’t address the issue that there’s trauma that happened no matter what. And that’s why people who are getting out in the military or even like they’ll, they’ll kill themselves right before they have everything set up there. They have a whole job lined up, all this stuff, but they’re leaving, they’re leaving their family that they’re, and they’re leaving them in harms way and they believe that they can save them or whatever if they were there. A lot of the regret and the room is like, these people died, but I wasn’t there. So they were that they hold onto the fact that they died because of them and then they end up drinking, sedating, whatever they do, sex, money, drugs, whatever.

15:42 And just avoiding looking back at that incident. And that’s what they call stuck point. That’s what in in pts, PTSD is what I call it. Post traumatic stress growth. Um, they’re stuck points that you need to work out with someone else like they needed to because I went through it in a UCLA and, uh, there were beliefs that I had that they were real and then they’ll manifest in reality because that’s what’s going on in our subconscious. And then the world gets small and then it’s like, I’m not here for anybody anyway. Why am I here? And then Bam, complete the mission. So there’s definitely a solution. Um, but the VA gets money for everybody that joins. They get like 10,000, $15,000 zero once we join in. And so every month they get that and they don’t want to, it’s already invested so they can’t give it back, you know? And that’s, that’s the fight really is. Um, is life worth money? That’s that.

16:43 It’s insane. I mean, so is the VA government entity or is it a private? Definitely government. Gotcha. I mean, it’s almost like, I mean just the whole opioid crisis. I mean everything going on now. It’s crazy that people get paid to prescribe it and it’s like, I mean I had surgery on my elbow and it’s like I got so many more pills than I should have. I mean it’s, it’s a whole different story. But um, I mean it’s crazy that there is financial gain to put someone through something, whether it’s going to be right, like Oran, like it’s just human life is not then regarded as like valuable. It’s just more of how much are you worth? Like how much you can put in our pockets. And that’s that I think is where the, I mean the system is broken. I don’t know much about the VA system or anything like that, but that right there is, once you start putting a dollar amount on someone, things will get done. That isn’t, it’s not for the benefit of that individual. I mean, what you just said now I can totally see where this hole now I see why. I mean, I’m from Yuma where there’s a huge military base there and just all my high school buddies, I went into the military people that have been there and it’s like you never hear anything good about the Va. I mean, after hearing this, I mean you can kind of see why and so is this pain point is what got you guys started on what you’re thinking about doing?

17:59 Oh, absolutely. Yeah. It’s a really get into that. Like you said, sex, drugs and rock and roll. I was, once I was out, I was looking for any distraction for a while. It was healthy, it was running and I’d get up and run like eight miles every morning. Uh, by the time I moved out here I had friends who thought I was like freakishly skinny. Uh, not so much the case now I blew, I blew out my knee about a month after I’d moved out here and had, I have two knee surgeries and just quit with the running at that point and it went right back to drinking like crazy. And then just other drugs and crap and just looking for any girl just to like be with me that night so that I didn’t have to be alone in bed and like in my head because just like being in my head was the real fear.

18:39 It was just anytime I was alone with my thoughts just sucked. And it was when you’re alone with your thoughts the most is probably when you’re about to be going to sleep. Uh, and that just slowly over time it just kept getting worse and worse. You know, until the point that I got to be suicidal and thank God for my dog that night my roommates were out of town for Christmas and I just like pulled out my nine and I, well 40 and thought about just shooting myself. I just didn’t want to be around anymore. It seemed like such a struggle and I was pissed off cause it seemed like I had to be here like for my family, like the like they seemed like a burden that I had to stay alive just to not upset my family. Yeah. Like that’s the only thing.

19:19 And my dog pushed your way up to me and just like wouldn’t leave my lap or my side and I just bawled my eyes out, sold the gun within the next few days because I was scared to have it at the house and just decided at that point I was like, okay, well I haven’t saw me every night. Instead of just laying here and just dwelling in my thoughts and being stuck in this, I’m going to start looking for solutions. And I started looking up like alternative health and reading about like I found transcendental meditation when like met with that dude, he’s think it costs like 800 bucks or something to learn. And so I was like, well fuck that. I’ll find some other type of meditation.

19:55 And then I, yeah, I found headspace started meditating a, trying that out for a while. It didn’t fully stick because I wasn’t extremely consistent with it. I tried out acupuncture, I started trying to all kinds of things and just, I knew that the problem couldn’t be new since there’s been like warriors forever and just, I see it in all my buddies that I was in the army with. So it’s like this isn’t new. There’s, there’s gotta be something that they used to do, otherwise you’d hear about it a lot more. And then, uh, yeah, that’s eventually when I found Jake Clark, who is the founder of save a warrior of video of him talking about how it’s not new and there were rituals before and how that’s what he created in his program. When I go over to save a warrior site and it’s maybe like two 30, two 45, like in the morning at this point.

20:43 And I, I see it, I looked through it and I see a lot of language on it from a, this makes it sound like he’s been through a personal development program midway through. So I was like, okay, I can trust this dude. Yeah. Uh, then I go ahead and I start filling out the application and they let you, they have an open ended question there at the end. Like, I don’t know what the wording was like. It’s pretty much like what’s going on in your life. Yeah. And I just unloaded like tears falling all over my keyboard, unloaded on this and then as soon as I get done with it, I sat there for a while looking at the submit button, scared to hit it because I didn’t feel worthy to submit. I didn’t feel worthy to go to Malibu for five and a half day retreat, like a somebody who needs it more than me.

21:24 I only had one deployment. Like somebody like somebody who’s missing a leg that needs it. Somebody like lost more friends. It was just like I wasn’t worthy enough. Uh, finally I just got to in my head is like, okay, well you thought about killing yourself recently, dude. Like you don’t have a choice. You have to hit submit. Uh, you have to like take new actions. You have to change something. So I hit it and within 15 minutes I got a call and this is in the middle of the night. And the dude who called me, I know now, he was a full time police officer at the time and running cohorts for save a warrior like every time doing tons of work for them. So probably working at least 80 plus hours a week. Yeah. Like I don’t think he slept. And he calls me in the middle of the night like, hey brother, this is tags from a save a warrior. How you doing? Uh, so immediately I just felt love, right. That was like, Oh shit that he assured me that I’m going to get into a cohort. He’s like, I looked over your stuff really briefly, we’re going to get you in. I’ll talk to you in the next couple of days about like actually scheduling a time, but he just wanted to make sure I was okay that night. Which like baffled

22:28 I, I mean did that, did that entire like Tron, like communication? Did I just feel like a weight lifted off your shoulder?

22:36 Oh, absolutely. It’s like I got that people cared that I was worthy and then like this was like even qualify themselves. Like did, he was in the military and all that. So I was like, okay. So somebody else like me has gotten help from this one and two, there’s people out there that care about me and love me, uh, that don’t even know me. So like there’s, there’s good out there and like made me seem slightly worthy at that point they were still working do to get there completely. But yeah, that, that changed things so much. Like I kinda had this knowing that things would be okay at that point.

23:11 That’s cool. So I mean it sounds like both of you guys went through something that is outside of the norm and I mean it’s, it’s not hair pills. Here’s this, like check this box off. It’s just more the mental, it’s exercising the mind. It’s just, I mean, getting out there, I mean from what it sounds like. And so I would love to hear more of what like I can totally see everything you guys have gone through now. What is this leading into? What you guys are trying to,

23:32 great. So what we see as a missing with a lot of these programs is everybody from all over goes to the, and then they go home and you’re still in contact, like on Facebook and stuff with everybody you went through with. But there’s not a local thing going on. There are some organizations that are local like that, like mission continues. There’s, there’s a few of them and they just go on runs and stuff, but they don’t really get deep into like mindfulness or anything like that that like we think actually helps. So what we’re creating, I’m a, I’m in talks with two yoga studios right now to start teaching warrior meditation at them. That’s also just to build a relationship and bridge the gap so that they, that’ll be a free class will start getting better incentive there. And I’ll start helping them out with some marketing to get veterans in and then seeing if afterwards they want some more marketing services.

24:23 But that one I’ll give for free, uh, just to help him out because there’ll be allowing us the space to help veterans. And then, uh, beyond that, just developing a program and developing relationships with them to have some, uh, veteran yoga programs healing throughout the, throughout the state. That’s cool. And then next step is getting them all like collaborating and doing a big fundraiser for like save a warrior because that’s the catalyst that got us to where we are and has helped hundreds of other veterans. So, uh, really just seeing how we can pay it forward like that. That’s really cool. And so how did the top Yoga Studios, I’ve got two interested, uh, one of them. We just need to nail down a date and a time for it going forward, which I’ll be having that conversation this week. And the other one, uh, just want some more details and info since it was just some Facebook messages.

25:12 But, uh, I have a relationship with them anyway, so they, they, they want to do it. They’ve done a fundraiser for Saul in the past. Uh, we just gotta get them the information they need and get it, get a really nice, so then it’s basically you guys would be creating the classes. Are you guys both? Do you need a certification at all or is it just knowing now? The cool thing about it is, uh, you know, I said transcendental meditation is like 1000 bucks. They paid for that when they first created save a warrior and they had everybody getting trained in that, but they always had that problem where it’s like, this is a meditation. Like why would you make somebody pay you $1,000 for a meditation that they can just do on their own forever? Uh, so they developed warrior meditation and trademarked it and they did that because the only rule about it is you can’t sell it.

25:58 They give it away as much as you want, but you can’t sell it ever. Uh, that was cool. Yeah. And so once you guys get this, how are you guys going to get people in? Do you guys have a plan on, on I guess your outreach and how you can get classes full? A few. I’ve got a, I’ve got a veteran buddies got this, uh, which I have to talk to them more about this. I’m sure he’ll support, he’s got this page, it might be a veteran if it’s like ton of funny memes and stuff, but he’s got like 100,000 followers a lot out here in Arizona. And also just running some Facebook ads to a storytelling talks and stuff that we’ll be doing going forward. But uh, yeah, so Facebook, some Facebook ads that like are geared towards veterans stuffs will find funny. And then, uh, started a video series with a few buddies around a veteran with all those stereotypes. All the Duchenne is the short shorts and everything. Drinking all of it, uh, going through a journey, finding holistic health and in that will be going to yoga studios and just different places and giving shout outs to the businesses. But it’s something that veterans will find funny and connect with. Each episode starts with getting trashed, uh, and just all the typical funny stuff. So there’s, there’s a few ways that we’re looking to get eyes on and then reaching out to some, uh, other veteran influencers too,

27:24 let’s say. Yeah, I mean, just, just getting, I mean, that video series, that’s, that’s huge. I mean even, well, I mean most people get stuck on, hey, let’s make it 32nd like commercial or spot. Like storytelling is what it is. That’s what’s going to, I mean it’ll get the ball rolling and it’ll just continue to grow and then all of a sudden it’ll just be something that, I mean just gets legs. Um, yeah. It’s, have you had anyone go through any of it yet? Uh, from you guys personally?

27:50 Me Teaching word? Yeah. Yeah. I’ve taught it to a lot of people, a lot of friends. So me and my girlfriend do it nightly. Really? Yeah.

27:57 Honestly, even getting other people that have been through it on something like this and just like, what was it takes up, what was it before? What was the process and how has that helped getting more and more people through that? I mean, I think that’d be huge because one, I mean it’s, it’s, it’s going to be easy to connect with other veterans cause that’s where you guys are. That’s, that’s, that’s going to be huge. But then it’s, if you can get other people that are basically on that fence where it’s like, Eh, just bread before they hit that submit button, just like, you know what I mean? Just kinda on that fence. Getting some of those videos that just like resonates different demographics, different, whatever it is, and just get how it’s helped. I mean that’s outside of that you can use the, the episodes to get like just some of the attention and be like, okay, that’s cool. We, we, we have someone’s attention now you can hit them with the testimonial type of stuff. And that’s where it’s just like, okay, you got the attention with the entertainment, here’s the testimonial to actually get them into the yoga studio. I’m going to be huge.

28:47 Oh yeah, that’s part of the girl with a funnel. I just kinda design. Then I have to finish building out, which is to give warrior meditation away online. But it’s all linked to alumni telling their story. And have you read, uh, you know, Russell Brunson. Okay. So, you know, experts secrets to lay out for like the epiphany bridge script, uh, using that. So like teaching people that and like having them tell their story using that so that they get like the internal struggle and all that. And it’s different people from the organization. So like you said, different demographics, different people will connect. Plus like 10 people could tell her story. And I’m only going to connect with maybe one of them just from one little thing. So the more we get, the more they connect to that and then all of them will be connected to this funnel that teaches word meditation. And then as we grow in the valley, just have more places that offer it in person also. But they’ll have it to where they know how to do with, they have a little training video and they can do it on their own. That’s cool.

29:46 No, I, I love the concept of just giving it away for free. I mean, it’s, it’s, it’s amazing how, how many people just say it’s, I can’t give away our secrets or get why it’s not our why positive to give stuff away for free. But it’s amazing the opportunity, the connections, everything that it brings. Um, by doing that, it’s really cool you guys are doing because it’s the last couple who had been in. It’s, there’s a whole sense of like community building and it’s, I think that’s so powerful. It’s like, I think with social media and everything like that, it’s people have seen the power of I guess connecting the world together and now I think the next steps are more of just the super niche, super narrow and creating groups like that where it’s just connecting people, using digital to connect people and then creating those local connections. And I think I think you guys are doing is huge. Um, you mentioned funnels. What are you, what do you, are you using like funnel lytics or are not fun to let x but uh, came and think of what click funnels. Yeah. Yeah. How’s that?

30:43 Uh, it’s a learning curve. I actually just got started on this one, uh, last night. Just briefly. I got the template and started editing some things in it. Uh, but I just built one out for another event I have going for foster kids at the end of the month. And that was the first like full on functioning funnel. I built it. It was fun. It was, it took longer than expected, but it’s because it’s not my thing so much. But yeah, I learned a ton going through that process.

31:12 What made you start doing that?

31:14 That really reading those books, I listened to a entrepreneur on fire for a while, like when I was at Asu, like a, one of the professors had us listen to a couple of those podcasts and I was like, okay, let’s do, it’s kind of cool. He’s, he’s a veteran too. Let’s listen to some more of this. And I started noticing, oh, he has the same exact questions every time. Uh, eventually you had Russell Brunson on, I’ve read that book and I was like, oh, he’s essentially asking the questions to get people to go through the hero’s two journeys. I get it. It’s the same stuff as in his book. He just asked it in a different way. I like it. Uh, and then just that book inspired the shit out of me. I was like, how else start a marketing company? We’ll do all this. And again, hit a lot of struggle, like, oh, I actually don’t know how to start a marketing company. So I just always go back into learning mode and learning. But you’re still wanting to do, yeah. Yeah it is. And it’s, I’ve, over the last few years, I’ve taken a lot of courses from like the gurus and stuff online,

32:10 uh, teachers just coming more and we should do like literally do a podcast on it, like once a month or whatever. But what, what are you learning and stuff like that. We’d love to connect. I mean I’m, I’m, no, I wouldn’t send my guru or anything like that, but I mean, I’ve been in marketing for about eight years now and stuff like that. So I mean, could definitely, I would love to it cause one, it’d be, I mean content for us, but to, I would love to help. I mean, just, yeah, yeah, that’d be fine. Yeah. Anyone that’s willing to learn, it’s, it’s, I mean, gimme started talking about marketing. You came to shut up

32:39 like out on this stuff,

32:40 but really, yeah. And you can probably tell what, I’m a bit stressed out because I, I think I buy more marketing books, more things just to bury my nose and I had like two of the way right now. What are they? A software secrets and then shoes. Well it’s always like I’m coming up against stuff like I need to learn more. All right, let’s, these books will help me. Education gap. And so what are the, are you guys going to be kind of functioning as the same roles or are you guys going to have two different roles as this goes or

33:09 oh definitely different roles. Figure out what’s what the needs are and how to split them up and then just enrolling other people into taking on things too. That’s something I’m learning in a couple of programs I’m in for personal development is if you’re trying to do it all yourself and getting tired, I said that wrong. If you’re getting tired, you’re doing it all yourself. So enroll other leaders in your movement. Get them willing and just stoked to be working with you and help like what you’re creating. So that’s something I’m working on constantly.

33:43 It’s is there a fear of they’re not going to execute in a way that I think I want them to execute her. They’re not going to care as much as I do or like is there a hesitation and delegate or creating that or is it just,

33:55 Oh yeah, I come up against that constantly. I have a buddy who just called me on it recently, like, uh, with this uh, event we’re putting on for these foster kids. I was trying to just, anytime something new came up, oh I’ll do that. Like, I’ll build a website for it. And I just kept jumping on all of your everything. He was like, no, dude, we, we have about 18 people that have stepped into roles for this. Tell them what to do. I want to just tell them they need to do this and by when. So learning to do that versus like, oh, well I could do it.

34:22 Yeah. It’s tough. It’s not, yeah. I mean, like I said, I mean this is only been around for like nine months that we’ve been in here, um, are all together. But it’s like I’ve never had a manager role before and I’ve never managed anyone. And all of a sudden it’s like, so learning to delegate is tough. It is tough. But once, once it works out and all of a sudden it’s just like, it’s like, Oh man, I wish I would have just done this a lot more sooner.

34:45 Oh yeah. This is a dose spot by the way. Keep looking up at like the bobble heads and the bushy, anything in particular that sticks out and they were listening to jump Bob’s burgers. Yeah, Tina. Yeah. Uh, you mentioned earlier like people who don’t like to, to give it away and I immediately glanced up at crushing it from Gary v cause like that’s his whole thing was just like give away your best stuff is like is like if you’re not, you’re going after the pennies and look at him. He’s got to $150 million company. Yeah. In a couple of years.

35:21 Yeah. I mean that’s the whole, it’s funny that the whole premise of this podcast is like, I mean at as even or how to use, like how all the, how tos, I mean even my parents have said something like, Hey, that’s your, that’s like, that’s your intellectual property. That’s, I mean that’s your secret sauce. Like why would you get, and it’s like, even if you do most of that, like even more and more people I’m working with, even if you give it to them, 99% are going to execute on it. And so that 1% though, that 1% of that does, they’re going to see huge value in, even though they might not get it, they might not bring you revenue directly. They’re gonna do it on their own or whatever it is. If someone else needs it, they’re going to be huge ambassador for you.

35:57 So through them they’re going to refer so many other people. And it’s, I mean, even other agencies in the valley like, Paula, are you doing that? But it’s like, I think they’re just gonna lead to more opportunity. Like, I don’t, I don’t want you to have to come to me just cause it’s, it’s our secret sauce. I want you to know that like, there is no really secret sauce. It’s just methodical. It’s all laying it out. It’s who are we talking to? What are we saying to them? What do we want them to do? And just using it. And then there is no secret sauce. It’s just taking time to set it all up, visualize it, map it out, and just execute on it. And so it’s like, it’s, yeah, it’s amazing when you get someone the keys and they realize how hard it is to turn those keys, that it’s like they’re going to come to you and it’s, it’s going back to the mental side of things. I mean, it’s like, how am I going to get mine if I’m giving it all away? And it’s, it’s a tough thing to wrap your mind around like, yeah, how am I gonna make money if I’m giving them all away for free? But it’s, yeah, I mean it’s, it’s leading to more and more opportunities. So it’s cool. I mean that’s, yeah, it’s, I think there’s nothing but positive income if you give it all away for free.

36:58 I agree. And that’s something you want the most. You got to give it away. Like the, to get what you want in this life is to help everybody else get what they want. And you find, for me, I found that it’s not all the stuff that brings happiness, that psych, uh, uh, a material solution for spiritual abnormality. It all starts with this spiritual connection for me, like connection with source, with listening for those intuitions, the things that come to us or there’s all these modes on you and I am meeting that is like divine. You know what I mean? And that’s, that’s what’s missing too is us trusting and believing that there’s something bigger than ourselves out there. Like if we give it away, it’s going to come back to us 10 fold. That’s their promises, you know what I mean? Not Mine. And you don’t do it for that reason, but when it starts to happen, you’re like, you, you believe more.

37:47 You know, some people were like, oh, I lost my faith and I looked at him, I say consider you didn’t lose your faith. We’re all getting the same measure of faith. You lost trust in the fact that someone that you, you know, our parents gave us life, right? But our higher power is the one that that allows us to live life more abundantly and see that like it’s not the money. Like there’s a song that says some people are so poor, all they have is their money. And I truly believe that because everything that comes is a gift. And if you see it as a gift, then you can give that gift away and then it flows. So that’s what I mean. It’s like someone with their hand close with money. It’s not going to the all they have is their money. All they have is this, this thing that’s holding them rather than opening their hand and watching it flow and come back in with anything in life, you know, really mind body, Spirit.

38:31 It’s all, we’re spiritual beings here experiencing this reality. But if we lose sight of either one of them is to our detriment. So we have to have reality, we have to have a base and we have to have something that calls us to do something more of ourselves where we just sit there and do nothing. Especially, especially now with everything at our fingertips. Instant gratification everywhere. It’s like, why are you doing that for me? That it always has to be, what is the purpose of this? Why am I doing this if I can’t see the purpose of doing it? And I was listening to Alan Watts other day and he says, yeah, she yourself like who you are or what you want. And if you asked yourself what you want and you don’t have any answers either cause you don’t know who you are or you have everything you want.

39:10 And right now the life I’m living in sobriety and with giving back and doing all this, it’s like I have everything I want. You know what I mean? I have love. I have an amazing motorcycle. I get to go. I have this freedom where I wake up in the morning and look up and it’s like I’m not rushing to work. I’m not doing this. And I’ve already done that. I was a man, I went to school for Engineering and was a field service technician for the northern California area, did all this. And I realized that it was like, that was, I was a robot. You know what I mean? I didn’t think for myself, and that’s what I’m learning to do now is like take time, pause in these situations and like really ask, you know, for health in, and it comes and it comes in the form of divine human beings because we’re all just a part of God.

39:54 That’s, you know, he divided himself instantaneously. That’s what it talks about. And it’s like understanding that those intuitions that we get, if we take that action, that’s where we learn, right? We can say I’ve studied so much stuff. I have so much knowledge. Like every book I read is like the same one. It’s, but it’s trying to get that same message across and it said, it’s all on us. You know what I mean? You have it all in you. You don’t learn how to be a manager by stat or you don’t, you know, experience jumping out of a plane by watching videos and doing all this. You actually, you can do all that, you know? And then when you’re at the edge, you’re like, wow, that video didn’t, was playing out to the field right here. So it’s like through those experiences and then our feelings about them, that’s where we learn.

40:37 You know what I mean? To like, oh I don’t want to do that anymore because it hurt this person, you know, not because someone told me not to do it or religion said, don’t do this. Don’t do that. That doesn’t work. That’s like when people go crazy. I mean, but, um, so like finding that balance and understanding that we’re here to enjoy life. Right. There’s no, anybody who judges us, I look at them, I say, hey, you know, I have a good day, but you’re not supposed to be here. Cause you know, my father doesn’t judge me, so neither does my mom or the spirit of God. So it’s like understanding that that’s why we’re here. We’re here for others, we’re here to be there for other people, trust God, Clean House, and help others in that order. For me, that’s, that’s what, that’s what works. And that’s the reason why, you know, when I hear about a veteran that takes his life or whatever, it just fires me up and I feel that and it’s like, man, I wish, you know, that could be there.

41:32 But then knowing that like, hey, he’s in, he’s in a better place. Yeah. Like there’s no unforgivable sin. There’s no, not like there’s always this moment that we’re going to go back to source. There’s no limitation in source. And we go there and we get to choose again or not. And um, knowing that brings peace and finding that piece, you know, allows me to let go a lot of stuff that I’m used to hold onto, but without stories, right. That’s what it says is like when you get to hear someone’s story and they go through this healing, it heals us. Like we don’t heal the wound. The wound heals us and acknowledging the wound and bringing it out, you know, allows other people to have this vulnerable space to share. And that’s really where it is. It’s like sharing those things, those secrets. We’re only as sick as our secrets.

42:22 And as long as we hold onto those secrets, that’s what’s killing us. That’s hell. You know what I mean? That’s the enemy. So it’s like you can have that. That’s what I want to be able to give to people. Like, you know, during the war and meditation, people get stuff and like I went and shepherded, which is where you get to give back what we were given so freely because the seats are free and save a warrior. Jake does all the work and everybody else does all the work to create those funds. That’s why we want to raise money for them. And it gives people their life back. Like, literally, it allows me to be an amazing father for my son to be able to have these conversations when he’s young that I didn’t have, that was avoided, you know, um, and saw his discovery and the recovery came from me in the rooms of Aa and also in um, Aca, adult children of alcoholics and dysfunctional families. And part of the dysfunctional family is a militant father. So everyone that was in the military, how they raised their kids is it’s propagating this dysfunction and there is a way to, to heal it and address it. And that’s part of the whole meditation is teaching people to have a relationship with their higher power, with their, you know, source.

43:30 And after you guys had done this, I mean the whole mental side, have you guys noticed anything where maybe a situation comes at you that you guys handle it differently or perspective is a lot different than maybe say 12, 16, 18 months ago. Cause it’s, I do as much as I can to try and work on the mental side of things. And it’s crazy where I, I mean three years ago it’s, there’ve been things that have happened and now I look at it and it’s like I try and find the positivity in it and then like, hey, you know, what had happened to your point, divine intervention. There’s some, there’s a reason why this happened. Whether it doesn’t make sense now, it might not make sense in a week, a month, a year. Eventually it will. And it’s funny, this actually just played out recently where right before, two days before we were going to put money down on our, uh, um, wedding venue before we got married, I was dealing with some IRS stuff and they went in and just took like nine grand out of bank account.

44:20 And uh, yeah, and it’s, it, it sucked at the time. But I mean, at a time [inaudible] I told my wife or fiance at the time, like, you know, we’ll figure it out. It’s all gonna work out, blah, blah. Now we’re in the process of getting a house and it’s like if you have federal debt, you can’t get a house. And so now I look back and it’s like if that wouldn’t happen, we’d be at a point now where we can, and it’s just like I could sit there and look at that like now and be like, this sucks. Life is horrible. But it’s like, you know what? We’ll figure it out. Life San gone and it’s funny, it came around full circle literally a couple of days ago in both side than a thought. I was like, Hey, you know what, if we still had that, we won’t even be able to get this. So it’s like whenever you think you’re down and getting kicked in the gut, it might actually be lifted up. And so I guess I was long winded way of saying, have you experienced things like that where it’s like you’re perspective changes as hurdles get thrown at you?

45:05 Yeah. This, this path, this growing in this journey to heal is actually what it takes to actually heal. Like going in, doing the work, meditating daily, reading books, changing your perspective. It’s changed so much. I mean like I, I go to bed at night and I sleep like that. Like that might sound small and maybe somebody listening, but I go to bed at night and I sleep like that’s crazy for like, because for years, not just months or anything, but years, it wasn’t like that. Uh, so like that’s huge and I’m just, I’m pretty zen and calm all the time. I don’t really get angry. Maybe the bit irritable at times, which usually just means I’m tired or hungry. Yeah. But uh, yeah, I’m just so much more calm and like you said, just in the face of a problem, it’s just no problem at all. This is just something we work around. Either go round and go over it through it, whatever you have to do. But it doesn’t stress me out to where it used to

46:07 learn how to deal with adversity a little bit better. I mean, it just, you don’t dwell on it. You figure out how to rise above.

46:13 Yeah. And the awareness, the consciousness of it. If something triggers me on outside, it’s really where I can go to work on the inside. And then learning to admit my faults and ask for forgiveness was super hard because like that’s, that’s weakness and for men, not biggest thing is I to appear weak is not at that super. And you know the military, you can’t appear weak at all. Like the, he said you’ll get ridiculed. I had the highest temperature on the boat because they injected us with the smallpox vaccine, which I told them I am do this and I’m like, I don’t do well with this stuff. Yeah. And My, the guys were like mad at me that I wasn’t on watched that I was like near death. They were going to medevac me off the boat and they’re still talking shit. Like they’re like, Paul just wants to get out of watch.

47:05 I wanted to go kill those dudes. And it’s like that too. It’s like, cool, I’ll trade with you bro. Go stand up for our watch. I’m like dying right now. [inaudible] that’s a real mental toughness, mental strangler there. If you can get in, then you gotta ask them to write above a hundred. I got to deal with these guys like all the whole time.

47:30 Dude, you’re like the only guys on the boat. So it’s like you, you secretly hate them. That’s the resentment I’m learning, you know? And, but you got to work with them and it’s just like God, like these are not my friends, but you have that attachment and there’s no practice to like get through that and now I can turn away from something. I’ll some, I still go through it like, man, I feel like I’m a week dude. Like I used to just stand up to anybody and tell them whatever, what’s up now it’s not worth it. You know what I mean? And it’s not worth it, not only for me but for that person. Cause I, I’ve heard before, I’m a scary guy, you know, and I don’t want to be, but um, if there’s something that I, that I care about, there’s an effective way to communicate that.

48:13 Like, I can, I can be angry and not act on your, I say did that really angers me. And before I know you, oh, I could just say like, actually. And that’s, I guess more intimidating for some, you know, I don’t know, but it’s like just acknowledging my feelings and what they really are. It’s not just hate and love. You know what you used to be. Um, it’s, you know, hey son, that’s you really irritating me right now. That’s very annoying. And I’m sorry I hurt your feelings. I said that. But maybe learn to stop being annoying and then allowing people to have their feelings. Right. I’m not responsible for anybody’s feelings. There’s my problems. God’s problems are my problems. You were problems in God’s problems. And when I get stressed out, I’m like taking on God’s problems and I am not God. Thank God I’m not.

49:02 Because you guys would all be dead and being able to like laugh at this stuff, that would never happen. You know, like there’s nothing rule 62 don’t take life too seriously. And that’s a big, huge thing for me. Cause I used to be super serious all the time cause I thought that I had to make all this stuff work. I thought I had to be, you know, this certain thing. And um, you know, people pleasing and all that stuff. It’s like it doesn’t work. And so relieving when you step away from that, everyone, it’s exhausting. Yeah.

49:35 And then it’s just like you stretch yourself too thin and then it’s tough to actually execute 100% on what you’re proud. And it’s just, yeah, it just, it’s not a formula for long term sustainability. Like it’s just, yeah.

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